February Cherubs | Testing Thread

[littlewitch]

Suggerhoney --i am sorry that you are feeling so down. I think a lot of us on this thread echo your feelings at one point or another. TTC over 35 has been MUCH harder for me.

 

[littlewitch]

AFM, I am 4 dpo today. Nothing to note except bilateral lower pelvic cramps on the day projected by PreMom app as ovulation day.
With my last chemical, I had cramps on 6 and 7 dpo, so we will see if anything happens.
We only BD the day of my (insanely dark) OPK, so I don't know what chance I have.

 

[Suggerhoney]

@littlewitch
I think with all of us here that have been trying for a very long time , and after losses all feel that deep sadness at being out yet again.
It really so so difficult and so emotionally exhausting.
Fx for cramps soon my lovely followed by that sticky beanie BFP.
I’ll just live through you ladies now until it comes around to ovulation again.
Probably have a long wait ahead.
Don’t seem to be ovulating until later now.
Was great when I used to ovulate earlier and got pregnant with my son on a day 10 ovulation.
And the miscarriage I fell with my old normal cd13 ovulation.
But now it seems I ovulate more around cd16.
I’m on a higher dose of maca now so mite ovulate even later next cycle.
AF showed at 13dpo last cycle and 14dpo the cycle b4. But I don’t usually start until 17dpo.
So I’m expecting it any time really from Saturday onward.
ordered some more strip OPKs today and May get another 5 sticks for the digital opk. I do still have 6 sticks left but just get another 5 Incase it’s a late ovulation.
Urghh I hate this bit so so much.

I always like those early dpo days u know b4 you would get any symptoms.
But then as soon as I get to the symptoms stage and have none that’s when I start to feel out and low.
I always know if im 8dpo and I haven’t got one symptom, I just know deep within me im out. And proven right every time so far.

im praying so hard that next cycle will be the one for me, and I get that sticky BFP early March.

 

[HalfricanMa]

I put my ttc material away now. No more pee cup nor tests.

 

[Saradavies89]

Yeh I’ve been doing loads of strips but for me the more the day passes the lighter the line so must be morning that’s best for me maybe.

how shit for you! That’s well annoying making

@littlewitch
I think with all of us here that have been trying for a very long time , and after losses all feel that deep sadness at being out yet again.
It really so so difficult and so emotionally exhausting.
Fx for cramps soon my lovely followed by that sticky beanie BFP.
I’ll just live through you ladies now until it comes around to ovulation again.
Probably have a long wait ahead.
Don’t seem to be ovulating until later now.
Was great when I used to ovulate earlier and got pregnant with my son on a day 10 ovulation.
And the miscarriage I fell with my old normal cd13 ovulation.
But now it seems I ovulate more around cd16.
I’m on a higher dose of maca now so mite ovulate even later next cycle.
AF showed at 13dpo last cycle and 14dpo the cycle b4. But I don’t usually start until 17dpo.
So I’m expecting it any time really from Saturday onward.
ordered some more strip OPKs today and May get another 5 sticks for the digital opk. I do still have 6 sticks left but just get another 5 Incase it’s a late ovulation.
Urghh I hate this bit so so much.

I always like those early dpo days u know b4 you would get any symptoms.
But then as soon as I get to the symptoms stage and have none that’s when I start to feel out and low.
I always know if im 8dpo and I haven’t got one symptom, I just know deep within me im out. And proven right every time so far.

im praying so hard that next cycle will be the one for me, and I get that sticky BFP early March.

Have u thought about giving your self a month or so off? I understand why you wouldn’t want to just thinking about how this is effecting you mentally and u may need a little break xxxx

 

[Laurabub84]

@HalfricanMa good luck. I hope ovulation is confirmed and this cycle brings you that bfp

@Suggerhoney i wish there were some words of comfort I could give to you. I understand how you’re feeling having been there myself many times. Just wish I could give you a hug.

@xZoeyx oh it must be so frustrating not knowing if you have ovulated or not. I wasn’t going to temp at all this time around but I’m glad I have now or I’d be the same and constantly questioning things. Would definitely recommend it.

@josephine3 i hope you get answers soon hun. I can imagine how frustrated you must be having to wait so long for results. It’s annoying when they have the results sitting there but make you wait for them. It’s your body and you have a right to be told

@littlewitch good luck for testing time. Fx’d for a bfp

afm cd19 and still no ovulation. Not sure if my cm is maybe starting to become more ewcm but I thought maybe it was a few days back and it wasn’t. Relieved I haven’t ovulated while dh’s been on nights but I’m also starting to feel so nervous that I’m just not going to at all. Really hoping it happens over the weekend. I conceived my son cd21 so have been trying to reassure myself I still have time for it to happen. I just don’t think i can handle an anovulatory cycle. Not knowing how long it will go on for. My longest in the past was 117 days. I’m always scared of it happening. It’s already getting me down that nothings happened yet

 

[josephine3]

@Suggerhoney sorry about another bfn. Would you not get any free fertility testing? Iv had the bloods and scan free on nhs even though I already have 2 children. Maybe @Saradavies89 is right? Take a month or 2 to destress and enjoy the baby you have! I don't want him to grow up fast and you to look back and think you didn't fully enjoy if because you were focused on ttc another if that makes sense xxx
@littlewitch that's interesting what you were saying about the scan. I was under the impression she could do a follicle count but wouldn't lol. That's how it came accross. They did offer a hsg but that would be a separate appointment. And yeah apparently that's the only way to really see the tubes properly.

I think I'm 5 or 6 dpo today, ff says 5 but I'm sure I had ov pains on the day of my peak so will def be starting to test soon as usual! I bought like 50 one steps too so I can waste them to my hearts content x

 

[josephine3]

@Laurabub84 hope you get your peak soon! I sometimes don't ov until day 18-19 so I know what it's like having a long wait x

 

[NDH]

I'm going to push my testing date back a few more days now if AF doesn't come. I can't bring myself to pay $15 for one pregnancy test (just for the cheap ones even. Our dollar store seems to have gotten if of pregnancy tests since I was last there) so I just ordered some cheapies from Amazon that won't be here til Wednesday probably. If AF isn't here by then I'll know without needing to test, and if AF does show up then I'll have tests for next month.

 

[josephine3]

@NDN what dpo are you now? Good luck hope af doesn't show up x

 

[NDH]

10dpo I think.

 

[Suggerhoney]

Thanks for all the comments ladies.
I will chat with the doctor on the 20th when I have my meds review to see what they say.
They may offer the 21 day test again.
But I know for AMH etc, I would have to be referred to the hospital.
And that means that awful nasty doctor again.
He was so nasty to me at 40 so will be even worse now I’m 43.
Pluss like I said b4 I don’t really want Im ttc on my medical notes for reasons Ive already explained.

I can’t really take time time out at my age either. I know you mean well and are thinking of my mental health, but I just can’t take time off. Not even one month.
Even tho I did not want a summer due date I still continued to try because I new I couldn’t risk losing any Chances any month at my age.
I’m 43 now and will be 44 in December so I don’t have time to take time out.
What if I took a month off and that was the month I was supposed to conceive. I would then miss that one and only chance.

also please don’t think I don’ t treasure every second with my son. Because I do.
He means the world to me, and you ladies and him are the ones that help me through the hard days. Like I’ve said in the past I am so so thankful and greatful for all my children. They are all such wonderful blessings. I know I’m very privileged to have them. When others don’t have any.
That’s why I’ve said several times now that I feel so guilty for wanting another.

I always feel mostly sad at this stage, mainly 10 and 11dpo I feel the worst. And then I’m ok.
And when I get that peak I start getting some hope back again.
It’s just always at this stage I feel hopeless.
I know I’ll be ok in a few days when I get into a new cycle.

im sorry if I bring anyone down with my posts.
I really wish I could switch that longing for my rainbow baby off.
I truly do.
But I can’t.
Ever since my miscarriage that longing has been incredibly strong.
I can’t help how I feel.

A lady in a over 40 ttc group on FB said to me I may have a blocked tube.
She said she had a tubal pregnancy and then had 9 months of BFNs like me and felt exactly like I do.
She went for a scan and one of her tubes were blocked.
She’s since had surgery to unblock it.
I’m now worrying about that.

A place where I had my gender scans also do like fertility stuff.

like a blood test for AMH and a full pelvic scan to check ovaries and womb lining and tubes and egg reserve etc.
It’s 300 quid, which for us is a lot of money.
That’s basically a whole month food shop for us.
I spoke to my husband about it but he’s said a clear no.
He said to me you haven’t got blocked tubes and your still fertile and it’s just taking longer because we’re both older.
He says he doesn’t want to waste money on something I don’t need.
So that’s that completely out the window.

I said to him could we consider it in a few months if I’m still not pregnant but he didn’t say much.

 

[Suggerhoney]

Oh and I managed to find the old maca I was taking in the end.
So typical after I’ve brought new ones.

they have changed the packaging, it used to come in a plastic pot, but now comes in a foil type bag.
Guess trying to lose less plastic to save the planet.

I will carry on with the new ones now as it’s 2000mg per tab let.
I was taking 2000mg when we fell with my son. But I had to take 4 of the buggers to make it up to 2000mg and there quiet big.
It’s much easier just taking 1.
Pluss it’s red maca all on its own as that’s supposed to be the best colour maca for fertility in women.
So will continue and see how I get on.


I hope and pray it isn’t anything that requires medical help or treatment.

im hoping the reason I haven’t fallen again is because of being so unwell on and off all last year.

The miscarriage in June
Covid July.
Flu very end off September and October
Partial bowl blockage end of October
Then stomach flu in December.
I know I’m still ovulating but I’m hoping the reason I haven’t fallen again yet is because all those illnesses.

but I’m hoping (touch wood) now I’ve been well for 2 months I will fall vvvv soon.
I just hope and pray I’m not too old and there’s nothing going on that is stopping it from happening.

 

[Suggerhoney]

@NDH
I wish you so so much luck for when you test hon.
Hope AF stays away.

you have the patience of a saint to hold off from testing.

 

[Saradavies89]

Oh sure honey I Understand you not wanting to give it a break, also ( we all do it!) think that what someone else has got you have got I know it’s hard lovely thinking of u xxx


AFM got my static smiley today! Any guess to what I’ll be doing later lol xxx

 

[xZoeyx]

@josephine3 I am now on CD 23, AF is due in 9-10 days roughly. No idea how many DPO or if I even did O so this cycle is very much a guessing game!

@HalfricanMa It's frustrating not knowing what is going on on the inside, I actually think not knowing if I have ovulated is worse than me not knowing I will be pregnant. At least with pregnancy I will know for sure via AF, whereas O is a guessing game even with the sticks. But if I am out this month then I will definitely be temping in future.

@Suggerhoney I am really sorry that you are out, part of me would still like to say hold onto that tiny bit of a miracle but I understand that for your own mental sanity you want to let this month go as such. Onto the next, try and think of it as if not when. In terms of hubby, I hope you don't mind me saying but it's very naive and a little selfish actually to not allow you to get tests done by assuming that ''it's just old age''. For a start, you aren't old atall, theres another lady I read somewhere who is having her 2nd at 50.


AFM - Well as you've all gathered, whether I ovulated or not will remain a mystery. I had all the signs but in all the wrong times and places! I had a mix of everything O wise, the tugging pain, the EWCM, the nearly peak tests etc just never actually saw a peak. I will start temping from hereon.

I did take a test today because I am an idiot, in my head I was like well technically I haven't got a clue how many DPO I am, maybe I am 5 but maybe I am 8 who knows! But yes naturally it was stark white. I am not due AF until 12th Feb so another 9 or so days to think about testing. I really want to tell myself I will hold out until at least next week really but I know I cannot resist. And I have so many tests to waste lol.

I am very tempted to sit down and talk to my OH about trying for one more month, giving us a November baby. It's not ideal as we would have Christmas, then my Daughters birthday in January and my Sons in March so finances would be stretched but the thought of stopping now and waiting till july time to start just feels so...wrong? I dunno.

Hope everyone has a great Friday

 

[jellybeanxx]

@josephine3 I know we all talk about the NHS being free but that’s not strictly true, it’s only free at the point of use. We all pay for it with our taxes! So don’t feel you should accept subpar care because it’s ‘free’. Im sorry you had to deal with an awful, mardy (not heard that word since I lived in the midlands for university ) practitioner when you should have been treated with care and compassion. I’d speak to PALS, they’ll be able to address the way you were treated but possibly also be able to help you get your results as they can liaise with doctors for you. They always listen to PALS and it gets you much further!

@Suggerhoney

I’m just catching up after a very hectic few days. We got puppies! I’ve wanted dogs for so long but all these TTC struggles have taken their toll and I decided I’d be getting new babies even if they are fur babies!
Anyway, I’m CD8 now and finished my letrozole. Hopefully it does the job!

 

[tdog]

@josephine3 I know we all talk about the NHS being free but that’s not strictly true, it’s only free at the point of use. We all pay for it with our taxes! So don’t feel you should accept subpar care because it’s ‘free’. Im sorry you had to deal with an awful, mardy (not heard that word since I lived in the midlands for university ) practitioner when you should have been treated with care and compassion. I’d speak to PALS, they’ll be able to address the way you were treated but possibly also be able to help you get your results as they can liaise with doctors for you. They always listen to PALS and it gets you much further!

@Suggerhoney

I’m just catching up after a very hectic few days. We got puppies! I’ve wanted dogs for so long but all these TTC struggles have taken their toll and I decided I’d be getting new babies even if they are fur babies!
Anyway, I’m CD8 now and finished my letrozole. Hopefully it does the job!

Saw photos of the puppies and I must say I need cuddles lol you are only 40mins away so I'd drive that was for fur snuggles xx

 

[Lightning7]

Thanks for all the comments ladies.
I will chat with the doctor on the 20th when I have my meds review to see what they say.
They may offer the 21 day test again.
But I know for AMH etc, I would have to be referred to the hospital.
And that means that awful nasty doctor again.
He was so nasty to me at 40 so will be even worse now I’m 43.
Pluss like I said b4 I don’t really want Im ttc on my medical notes for reasons Ive already explained.

I can’t really take time time out at my age either. I know you mean well and are thinking of my mental health, but I just can’t take time off. Not even one month.
Even tho I did not want a summer due date I still continued to try because I new I couldn’t risk losing any Chances any month at my age.
I’m 43 now and will be 44 in December so I don’t have time to take time out.
What if I took a month off and that was the month I was supposed to conceive. I would then miss that one and only chance.

also please don’t think I don’ t treasure every second with my son. Because I do.
He means the world to me, and you ladies and him are the ones that help me through the hard days. Like I’ve said in the past I am so so thankful and greatful for all my children. They are all such wonderful blessings. I know I’m very privileged to have them. When others don’t have any.
That’s why I’ve said several times now that I feel so guilty for wanting another.

I always feel mostly sad at this stage, mainly 10 and 11dpo I feel the worst. And then I’m ok.
And when I get that peak I start getting some hope back again.
It’s just always at this stage I feel hopeless.
I know I’ll be ok in a few days when I get into a new cycle.

im sorry if I bring anyone down with my posts.
I really wish I could switch that longing for my rainbow baby off.
I truly do.
But I can’t.
Ever since my miscarriage that longing has been incredibly strong.
I can’t help how I feel.

A lady in a over 40 ttc group on FB said to me I may have a blocked tube.
She said she had a tubal pregnancy and then had 9 months of BFNs like me and felt exactly like I do.
She went for a scan and one of her tubes were blocked.
She’s since had surgery to unblock it.
I’m now worrying about that.

A place where I had my gender scans also do like fertility stuff.

like a blood test for AMH and a full pelvic scan to check ovaries and womb lining and tubes and egg reserve etc.
It’s 300 quid, which for us is a lot of money.
That’s basically a whole month food shop for us.
I spoke to my husband about it but he’s said a clear no.
He said to me you haven’t got blocked tubes and your still fertile and it’s just taking longer because we’re both older.
He says he doesn’t want to waste money on something I don’t need.
So that’s that completely out the window.

I said to him could we consider it in a few months if I’m still not pregnant but he didn’t say much.

Sorry your feeling down @Suggerhoney and I totally get your reasoning for not taking any cycles off, I am always thinking the same, what if the cycle I take off is the one I would have conceived, and I am only 31, though 3.5yrs in it definitely feels hopeless at times. I hope we all get out take home baby soon!

 

[HalfricanMa]

Yay @jellybeanxx for puppies! Oh what work lol Do you feel the medicine working? I feel like mine has made my ovaries very tender. I hope i may still ovulate. Idk why i got a peak on monday and now friday morning still no temp rise.