- Joined
- Dec 7, 2010
- Messages
- 23,973
- Reaction score
- 2,422
Birth culture in the states does make it extremely uncommon to not have an epidural, and unfortunately makes it harder to go natural as well, between being looked at like you have two heads for not wanting one, and how pushy nurses seem to be about offering them too. But certainly it's not impossible.
I would suggest you read up on Michel Odent and really understand the fear/pain cycle, and have a toolkit full of natural pain relief options that your partner understands how to help you with (ie tennis ball for massage, wooden comb to squeeze, movement, hip squeezes, rebozo, light massage, aromatherapy, etc), or hire a doula who will know all those tricks and more already.
I dont know if hospitals in the states have baths or showers in the rooms for labouring in, but hot water is super effective pain relief.
Stay at home as long as possible, really communicate with your nurses that you do not want to have an epidural offered because you will ask if you need one (and it's a lot harder to say no in the moment when pain relief is offered, even if you're not at a point where you really feel you need it. It let's doubt and fear in.
Know your other medical pain relief options. There are many things to try in between no pain relief at all and an epidural. A lot of people seem to think that not having an epidural means laying on a hospital bed screaming in pain for hours because they dont know better. And yep, being stuck laying down in a bed while labouring without any pain relief would be a lot more difficult. Movement is an important part of labour for bringing baby into position and helps reduce pain.
Consider having a code word with your partner to use if you really *do* need an epidural. I really appreciated the knowledge that I could *ask* for an epidural but not actually get one (I didnt actually ask, though I did set goals with myself cause I thought about asking a lot) but it kind of had a placebo effect on it's own.
Affirmations are also a powerful tool. They give your mind something to focus on other than the pain and can help retrain your thoughts. Be aware of "magic thinking" though, which can end up setting yourself up for trauma if you do everything "right" and things dont go to plan.
Whatever happens this is *your* birth, not anyone else's, and no one can shame you for making different choices than they would, and nothing is set in stone. You can change your mind at any point and dont have to justify it to anyone
I would suggest you read up on Michel Odent and really understand the fear/pain cycle, and have a toolkit full of natural pain relief options that your partner understands how to help you with (ie tennis ball for massage, wooden comb to squeeze, movement, hip squeezes, rebozo, light massage, aromatherapy, etc), or hire a doula who will know all those tricks and more already.
I dont know if hospitals in the states have baths or showers in the rooms for labouring in, but hot water is super effective pain relief.
Stay at home as long as possible, really communicate with your nurses that you do not want to have an epidural offered because you will ask if you need one (and it's a lot harder to say no in the moment when pain relief is offered, even if you're not at a point where you really feel you need it. It let's doubt and fear in.
Know your other medical pain relief options. There are many things to try in between no pain relief at all and an epidural. A lot of people seem to think that not having an epidural means laying on a hospital bed screaming in pain for hours because they dont know better. And yep, being stuck laying down in a bed while labouring without any pain relief would be a lot more difficult. Movement is an important part of labour for bringing baby into position and helps reduce pain.
Consider having a code word with your partner to use if you really *do* need an epidural. I really appreciated the knowledge that I could *ask* for an epidural but not actually get one (I didnt actually ask, though I did set goals with myself cause I thought about asking a lot) but it kind of had a placebo effect on it's own.
Affirmations are also a powerful tool. They give your mind something to focus on other than the pain and can help retrain your thoughts. Be aware of "magic thinking" though, which can end up setting yourself up for trauma if you do everything "right" and things dont go to plan.
Whatever happens this is *your* birth, not anyone else's, and no one can shame you for making different choices than they would, and nothing is set in stone. You can change your mind at any point and dont have to justify it to anyone