Angry about pregnancy announcement

[LynnDAndrea]

I have my first child, a beautiful 7 month old baby and am very happy. I can’t imagine life without her.
I had a best friend that I was very close to and our friendship ended badly about 3 years ago! I had asked her to be a bridesmaid in my wedding and during our fight that fueled the end of our friendship she said she wouldn’t be in my wedding and we had already picked a dress and everything. I was very hurt and angry. We haven’t talked or seen one another since.
I recently looked her up on social media and saw a sonogram pic posting that she is having her first baby in July. I am so upset by this news. I feel like a horrible person. Why do I care anways? It’s almost like I don’t want her to experience the joy of motherhood but that’s awful. I have no relationship with her and don’t wish to. Than why am I so bothered about her pregnancy announcement?

 

[Jessica60]

I completely understand

 

[LynnDAndrea]

I completely understand

Have you felt the same?

 

[Jessica60]

Yes, exactly but I'm not sure why, so I'm watching this thread. X

 

[second.time]

Maybe you're feeling hurt and sad because you know that she's going through something big and you might typically have been part of her life, but because of the fight, you're not in touch? It could just be that sense of loss and missing your friendship manifesting as anger.

 

[LynnDAndrea]

Maybe you're feeling hurt and sad because you know that she's going through something big and you might typically have been part of her life, but because of the fight, you're not in touch? It could just be that sense of loss and missing your friendship manifesting as anger.

Yes very true. Even though we are not friends anymore doesn’t mean that at one point I did care. I also wonder if I am just being awful and would rather hear news that her life is not good and hearing exciting news about her having a baby means her life is going as she wants and I don’t feel she deserves positive experiences because she hurt me so badly. Again, I know that sounds awful of me.