ADHD or just being a toddler?

LoveMyBaby786 · Oct 13, 2014

My son turned 2 in july. My mum is always going on about how she thinks he has ADHD as he is so hyperactive etc..

I live at home with my parents until me and oh save up enough to move out.

An aunt of mine who is a pharmacist came over a few days ago. Literally only saw my son for 20 minutes but my mum 'described' what he is like saying he has ADHD and my aunt was like yeah sounds like he does.

To be honest what annoys me is my mum just labelling him as ADHD and then going around telling my aunt!

Fair enough my son is a handful not most but ALL of the time. No one can handle him. Here's some examples of what he is like:

He is always climbing the work tops in the kitchen no matter how many times we say no its dangerous etc..
He never shares his toys with my nearly 2 year old sister. If she has something he will want it and grab it off her whilst doing this evil laugh and she will be screaming or he will hit her to get whatever it is he wants off her.
He will open and slam the kitchen doors continously. Ignore him he will carry on, try and stop him he will run to the other side and do the same to the other doors.
He climbs on tv cabinet (tv is on the wall) and starts messing around with the tv screen then jumps on the sofa and starts again.
He will pile all the sofa cushions all 16 of then on the floor and if someone puts them back neatly he will chuck them all on the floor again.
When he is doing these 'naughty' things if we say stop it he will not listen.
He'll mostly run around the house doing these things or running uo and down the stairs all day long.
However, he does listen to other things such as can you pass me this please, go and get your shoes/coat or whatever else, give baby a kiss etc..
He can sit still for around 20 minutes watching tv or if he is colouring or something of that sort.

He cant really speak much just yet, he can say quite a bit of words (in his own way which i understand) like kah (eat in my language), juice, jake (his jake cup), taty (for baby), car, shoes, side (for outside) etc.. not 2 words sentences though.

Sorry for the long post just really want to know does this sound like adhd or just a very energetic toddler who doesn't like to listen?

sevenofnine · Oct 13, 2014

I think my problem is that the symptoms and signs of ADHD in children sound a lot like a description of a 2 year old in general...

2 year olds can be little terrors sometimes. Obviously I'd bring up his behavior to your doctor, but it doesn't sound very abnormal to me.

FAB mama · Oct 13, 2014

My guess is that it's normal and that maybe with so many people around disciplining him he could be lacking consistency? Do you think that's possible? If you, dad, grandparents etc are all telling him different things or disciplining different ways he may confused about boundaries. That's just a suggestion though since I don't know what your home life is like. My son is pretty active and a handful, but he's not quite to that extent (yet).

As far as I know, children are expected to be putting 2 words together by age 2 so you may want to mention that and the behavior to a doctor just to see what they say.

missk1989 · Oct 13, 2014

My toddler does most of the things you just described. Climbing on things he shouldnt laughing when he has hurt someone. Does not share a thing! I dont think it is ADHD. I think he is a toddler.

Bex84 · Oct 13, 2014

It sounds normal to me, I've known plenty of toddlers like that. Your mum needs to make sure she is not comparing your sister and lo. My lo is more laid back than nephew and its just different personalities, my nephew isn't naughty just more of explorer and on go. He also like your lo has additional adults at home and I can tell he finds it difficult when there are lots of adults disciplining all with differerent push points and it gets confusing.

mummy2o · Oct 13, 2014

LoveMyBaby786 said:
He can sit still for around 20 minutes watching tv or if he is colouring or something of that sort.

This makes me believe he doesn't have ADHD. 20 minutes is a long time for a child with ADHD and to sit still for that amount of time is a no go at all.

minties · Oct 13, 2014

Climbing, not sharing, running around like a headless chicken, not listening and enjoying cupboard doors sounds like every 2 year old I have ever met!

The speech part is the only thing that sent up a red flag in my mind.

d_b · Oct 13, 2014

What do you do for discipline? DS1 usually gets worse when we tell him to stop, especially if we just say stop a bunch of times but don't carry through with removing him from the situation. Typically we ignore bad behaviour because it seems to work better than a time out.

lau86 · Oct 13, 2014

I believe they don't diagnose ADHD till at least age 5 or 6 as up till then, behaviours of ADHD are too similar to 'normal' behaviour. But ask parents of children with ADHD they may say they noticed their child was different from a lot earlier than 5 or 6, it's just some children do grow out of it.
Basically he doesn't meet criteria for ADHD in any way at the moment

wookie130 · Oct 13, 2014

I am a special education teacher, and I will tell you right now that there is NO reliable way to diagnose or accurately label a child with ADHD at this young age. In fact, it's fairly impossible to differentiate normal toddler/preschooler behavior from a child w/ADHD. It's just too soon, and no good doc will prescribe meds or treat a child for the condition this early.

At this juncture, your child sounds very typical. Give him a year or two in elementary school, and then see where he's at.

Toddlers are little rabid crazy monkey people. Totally normal!

pinkpolkadot · Oct 13, 2014

As the others have said, it's difficult to tell at this age. My DD1 was similar, we found that getting her out of the house for large chunks of the day to burn off some energy helped (soft play, toddler group, park, walk in woods etc...) She is 3 now and still crazy but not quite so hyper!

I remember she used to climb up on the dining table over and over and wouldn't stop. We had to tie the legs of the chairs together so she couldn't pull them out and climb up. We toddler proofed the whole of down stairs in a similar way and it made things much easier!

LoveMyBaby786 · Oct 13, 2014

Thanks everyone!

His speaking the only thing i can think of as to why he might be delayed is because i speak english and my husband speaks our language (urdu) to him so he may be confused??

sequeena · Oct 13, 2014

You cannot diagnose ADHD at such a young age. My son is 3 and ADHD has been discussed with his paed but she said at their age they're so hyper anyway (and my son is mentally 1 year old) that it's impossible to diagnose. :hugs:

SarahBear · Oct 13, 2014

These sorts of behaviors could be a sign that a child has ADHD, but they can also be discipline problems. Since none of us are in your home but you, you're the most qualified to make that judgement for your child. As others have mentioned, they could also be behaviors that your child will grow out of. Your description does go above and beyond what I'd call "average," though.

MrsHedgehog · Oct 13, 2014

As others have said, 2 is too young to accurately diagnose ADHD. I work with young children and have encountered several with ADHD and it's not a simple case of children being active and a bit naughty. Maybe it would help put your mind at ease if you read up a little bit about ADHD so you know what to look out for in the future. For help dealing with your LO's behaviour I've found this website to be really helpful https://www.ahaparenting.com/

SarahBear · Oct 13, 2014

LoveMyBaby786 said:
Thanks everyone!

His speaking the only thing i can think of as to why he might be delayed is because i speak english and my husband speaks our language (urdu) to him so he may be confused??

Being bilingual can initially make one appear delayed in speech. In the end, being bilingual is an advantage, but it takes longer to get to proficient in speech.

LoveMyBaby786 · Oct 14, 2014

I didnt even think about it being because there are other adults in the house and everyone is responding differently to whatever my son does! Thinking about it now that could actually be a huge reason as to why he behaves the way he does. One will say no whilst the other says yes and gives in to his demands etc..

SarahBear · Oct 14, 2014

LoveMyBaby786 said:
I didnt even think about it being because there are other adults in the house and everyone is responding differently to whatever my son does! Thinking about it now that could actually be a huge reason as to why he behaves the way he does. One will say no whilst the other says yes and gives in to his demands etc..

Well then, discipline very well could be a contributing factor.

Zephram · Oct 14, 2014

He doesn't sound like he has ADHD to me, he sounds like a toddler. My son is a mile a minute too, and toddlers push boundaries to test your reaction and to get attention. If multiple adults in the house are giving him different boundaries and letting different things go then he is probably not responding to any attempt to set boundaries because it isn't clear to him where these are.

Talk to your family about what he's allowed to do and what he isn't and what you all do if he's doing something he shouldn't be. Also make sure he's getting out to run around every day, my LO needs to burn off steam - if he gets bored he just finds things to do to make his day interesting, if you get my meaning.

Bubuland · Oct 13, 2021

LoveMyBaby786 said:
I didnt even think about it being because there are other adults in the house and everyone is responding differently to whatever my son does! Thinking about it now that could actually be a huge reason as to why he behaves the way he does. One will say no whilst the other says yes and gives in to his demands etc..

How is your son doing now? An anxious mummy...!

ADHD or just being a toddler?

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